Walking Scared
Today, while everyone was at school and work, I went for a walk. Our estate is very quiet and feels very secluded, but is actually on a small dual carriageway. Admittedly, it is a very quiet dual carriageway, with the only traffic using it being the school bus, the shuttle bus between the estate and the local shops, and the man on the bike who rides round towing a wicker chair display. However, 5 minutes walk along this dual carriageway brings you to another dual carriageway. A 5 minute walk along here brings you to yet another dual carriageway (we have now walked round a sort of square if you can imagine) - and this dual carriageway is busy. At very busy times (which is most of the time), a man with a red flag and a whistle stands here. He wave his flag at cars and trucks and blows his whistle at bikes. This is also where the 7 Days restaurant is, and this was actually as far as I've ever walked before. But today I was determined and feeling that although the whole thing is a bit scary (walking away from 7 Days in the opposite direction from home was very much out of my comfort zone) it was something I had to do.
I carried on past a very pleasant sort of park area - there is a university here, and the park area actually belongs to the university. Immediately next to the park is a row of shops - but these are typical chinese shops - really just open fronted huts selling strange things - like empty plastic containers, or tubes - I didn't really spend too much time looking, I just kept on walking. Under the railway line. There are special pathways that run along each side of the road at this point, and are separated from the road by a concrete wall - they are wide paths for pedestrians and cyclists, but unbelievably, cars come down them, horns blaring, to queue-jump the traffic jam on the road. One young man on a bike deliberately kept to the middle of the pathway to prevent one taxi getting past. I kept as close to the wall as I could.
Another two minute walk and I came to another intersection - this is where the main road I'd walked along joins the Outer Ring Road, and crossing at this intersection is probably equivalent to trying to cross the M6 on foot at Thellwall Viaduct. There is a zebra crossing, and there is even a green man who appears from time to time - but this doesn't really mean anything. You step into the road, but there is still traffic coming at you from every angle. I have never been genuinely scared of crossing a road, but I was then. I know it's not good form to run pedestrians over, and running over a Westerner is probably punishable by death, but this didn't make me feel any better or safer.
Another thing that was making me feel distinctly uncomfortable was being stared at. When we're all out together, or at least when I'm with J, I never warrant more than a passing glance - it's her that they fall off their bikes staring at. But while I was on my own, and perhaps because I was on my own, I seemed to be getting lots of almost hostile looks. Determined, I still kept walking. I felt I couldn't give up - otherwise I'd never dare to go out again.
I was also terrified of getting lost. So far, I had walked along one straight road, but I had to turn left to get to the shops I had in mind. And then I had to turn right. I didn't dare make any more turns, as by now I was away from the main roads, and I wasn't sure how easy it would be to find a taxi. I walked past the shops and then back down the other side of the road. I bought a hair bobble (very nice, black velvet with pink silk lining) just so I could feel that my walk had a purpose, and then I set off back the way I'd come.
I was very relieved to make it home, about 2 hours after I'd set out. It was a hot day too, I'd guess at least 24 degrees, not a pleasant temperature for walking next to busy main roads.
I was glad that I'd done it, but I won't be doing it again for a while.
I carried on past a very pleasant sort of park area - there is a university here, and the park area actually belongs to the university. Immediately next to the park is a row of shops - but these are typical chinese shops - really just open fronted huts selling strange things - like empty plastic containers, or tubes - I didn't really spend too much time looking, I just kept on walking. Under the railway line. There are special pathways that run along each side of the road at this point, and are separated from the road by a concrete wall - they are wide paths for pedestrians and cyclists, but unbelievably, cars come down them, horns blaring, to queue-jump the traffic jam on the road. One young man on a bike deliberately kept to the middle of the pathway to prevent one taxi getting past. I kept as close to the wall as I could.
Another two minute walk and I came to another intersection - this is where the main road I'd walked along joins the Outer Ring Road, and crossing at this intersection is probably equivalent to trying to cross the M6 on foot at Thellwall Viaduct. There is a zebra crossing, and there is even a green man who appears from time to time - but this doesn't really mean anything. You step into the road, but there is still traffic coming at you from every angle. I have never been genuinely scared of crossing a road, but I was then. I know it's not good form to run pedestrians over, and running over a Westerner is probably punishable by death, but this didn't make me feel any better or safer.
Another thing that was making me feel distinctly uncomfortable was being stared at. When we're all out together, or at least when I'm with J, I never warrant more than a passing glance - it's her that they fall off their bikes staring at. But while I was on my own, and perhaps because I was on my own, I seemed to be getting lots of almost hostile looks. Determined, I still kept walking. I felt I couldn't give up - otherwise I'd never dare to go out again.
I was also terrified of getting lost. So far, I had walked along one straight road, but I had to turn left to get to the shops I had in mind. And then I had to turn right. I didn't dare make any more turns, as by now I was away from the main roads, and I wasn't sure how easy it would be to find a taxi. I walked past the shops and then back down the other side of the road. I bought a hair bobble (very nice, black velvet with pink silk lining) just so I could feel that my walk had a purpose, and then I set off back the way I'd come.
I was very relieved to make it home, about 2 hours after I'd set out. It was a hot day too, I'd guess at least 24 degrees, not a pleasant temperature for walking next to busy main roads.
I was glad that I'd done it, but I won't be doing it again for a while.
posted by Linda at 9:30 PM
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