Car chaos

Charley, perhaps unsurprisingly, is very keen on cars generally. I don’t know for sure how in-depth his knowledge goes, he certainly doesn’t seem to have taken any advanced driving courses (or even any basic driving courses now I come to think about it), but he is always thrilled to see an unusual car make on Shanghai’s streets. Apparently, import duty on cars here is extortionate, resulting in practically every car on the road being either a Volkswagen Santana (as made by Shanghai Volkswagen), or a Buick of some sort (as made by Shanghai General Motors). BMWs for example, are even more expensive here than they are in England. So, looking out for cars that aren’t either VWs or Buicks is how we pass many an hour sitting in traffic jams. Spotting such cars means the spotter has to shout out, as loudly as possible, the car manufacturer’s name. If at all possible, it is normal to prefix the car manufacturer’s name with a very excited, high-pitched, Chinese “oooooooooh!”

Sometimes, when Charley wins this little game, it is immediately obvious what car he has seen. “Ooooooooooh – Toyota!!” he shrieks, and nobody has any problem with that, even though Toyota is said (obviously) with a Chinese accent, and with the third syllable accentuated - Toy-oh-TAH! - rather than the second - Toy-OH-ta, as we would say it in English. But, as you can imagine, it is not always so straightforward.

“Ooooooooh – Bee em dabble you!” as a starter for 10 was not too bad. “Mer shady bans” was a little trickier. “Fur rarry” (pronouncing the 'rarry' to rhyme with ‘Larry’) took a bit longer to work out. “Oooooooh – shitty ron!!” was somewhat surprising when it first appeared out the blue. But I think the best one was “Louser Lacer”. This came out in conversation rather than in the car spotting game, so I didn't even have the car itself to look at to give me a clue. It had me completely stumped, and ended up with Charley having to draw the badge so I could work out what he was talking about. It turned out to be Rolls Royce.